Family Reunion mayhem
by LordZipster
Summary: The Three D's have decided to have a family dinner. Garp, Dragon and Luffy. This can only go one way right ?


The life is good for the Monkey D family…

The first family reunion ever…

Sanji looks over the mountain of dishes, wich include three entire SeaKings among much else. He has been working for several days looking for all the ingredients and finally got it all finished. The entire crew has been busy preparing for this major first time event. Luffy has been a true pain in the ass to keep away from the galley stealing food. Nami has been even worse. Not a single kiss for the busy cook. Sanji smiles and start to nosebleed just by the thought of her appearance. And that makes the multiple bumps on his head start to ache again. Well it was worth it for Nami-swaaaan, Sanji said out loud.

Zoro is as usual working out like a madman. Lately he has been anxious about all this yahoo with a family reunion. The Marines is most likely to swarm like sardines around the island. Not to mention all of Dragons underlings trying to avoid all the Marines. And… in the middle of it all. The Straw Hat crew. How the hell this is going to end, Zoro wondered. I just hope noone is going to interupt this family reunion.

Over att the poopdeck Franky is busy mending the last piece of furniture Sanji landed on trying to steal a kiss from Nami. Thankful that Cola is not on the menu he gulps a bottle from his personal stash of premium longstored high end Colas. Refreshed of the smooth taste and sparkling fizzle he continues to put nails in what used to be a sofa.

At a rock over on the island Luffy, Chopper and Usopp is sitting with fishingrods in their hands. Behind them Robin is sitting in a chair reading a book. Luffy is snoring loudly and Usopp is daydreaming as usual. Chopper looks just plain bored. Suddenly Robin looks up and points at the horizon. - There they are, she says with a calm voice. Usopp looks up and totally freaks out. In the bay there is 28 Marine Battleships approaching.

\- WE ARE ALL GOING TO DIE… NO WAY WE CAN SURVIVE 28 BATTLESHIPS, Usopp shouts like a madman. He starts to run to the forrest but gets captured by Robins hands even before he could run three meters.

\- Take it easy Usopp, she calmly says. You know that Garp is coming. And of course he can not come without an escort.

\- 28 SHIPS ? Could he not be a bit moderate at least ?

Robin smiles and releases Usopp.

\- He is Luffy's grandfather after all.

Luffy wakes up and spots the ships.

\- OIIII ! Gramps ! Now it is time for MEEEEAAAAAAT !

The biggest of the ships enter the port and the Strawhats go down to greet them. As the ship enters the harbour three familiar faces enters the side of the ship. Garp, Cody and Helmoppo stands there as the ship is entering the dock. It has not even had its tenders tightened until Garp jumps of the deck and grabs Luffy by the collar.

\- Have you not given upp this Pirate stuff yet? He smacks him in the head and Luffy ends upp with a painful bump on his head. Is my lowlife scum of a son here yet?

Luffy holds his aching head and mumbles something unhearable wich results in yet another bump on his head.

\- Why did you do that, Luffy shouts.

\- You did not answer fast enough. You shall show me respect, bellowed the huge Marine Admiral. So. Has my unhung son come here yet ?

\- No he hasn't, Luffy shouted still holding his head in pain.

\- Well then. Show me the food. I'm starving.

From the big Marineship someone yells out loud about a sail from the east. Some half an hour later a ship enters the docks and Monkey D Dragon steps down from the ship.

\- SO! You finally decided to show up, Garp yells. I should arrest you right now. I have 3000 men ready to take you in.

\- No you don't dad. Look again.

Garp looked out and found that all the other ships has moved almost to the horizon.

\- Don't touch my ESCORT, Garp shouts and give Dragon a Fist of Love. Now where is the food?

All three of them is walking towards the beach where the crew has put up all the food. Garp is going first with father and son following with remarkably big bumps on their heads. All three of them get sparkles in their eyes when they look at all of Sanjis food. No more than five seconds later they start to eat. Hmm… More like shoveling food down into their mouths. With a shovel. Hastilly!

Nami is looking quite miserable considering they are eating food at an alarming rate. All that Beli that it took to buy it would have been enough to buy a new ship. Or twelve. She just see all that gold gulping down the throats of her captain and his relatives. A tear of remorse is running down her cheek. Sanji waveres to her with a tasty desert. - Nami-swaaaaan. Only made for you!  
Nami takes the desert and start to eat it, still sobbing.

A commotion is heard at the table. Chopper is yelling at Dragon. - I am NOT food! You are NOT to eat me.  
\- But… I thought you were an uncut garpachio…

\- I AM NOT FOOD!

Dragon sharpens his knife with a drooly expression on his face.

\- LUUUUUFFYYYYYY! ! ! Help meeeee!

\- Huh, Luffy looks up. Don't eat our doctor dad. Try this SeaKing instead.

Grumping Dragon chops of a large piece of the SeaKing.

Strangely nothing is heard from Garp in a while Zoro notices. He has a large bubble coming from his nose and he appears to be sleeping. The food is still chomping into his mouth at a reckless speed nonetheless. Must be a familytreat Zoro thinks and empties a barrel of sake. The bones from the feast is growing remarkeably big now and the food on the table is beginning to go scarce.

\- You dimwitts, Garp shouted. I raised you to be good Marines. And look at you now. Pirates. Where did I go wrong?

\- You made the wrong dad, Dragon answered. How do you think I got where I am today?

\- You stole everything you could lay your hands on, you schmuck ! You even stole my butplug as a child, Garp said.

\- I know that. I still use it though, Dragon answered with a smirk on his face. Even as we speak now father.

\- THAT WAS MORE INTEL THAN I ASKED FOR, Garp exploded and pounded Dragon on the head again. Another bump appeared on his head as Dragon rose from the hole his body created from Garps gigantic Fist of Love. Luffy just kept on eating never bothering saying anything.

The food was almost out now and the three was frantically hurrying to chow down as much as possible until it all was out. The three SeaKings were now all bones and the rest of the plates were allmost empty now. Just three pieces of grilled raven was left. Usopp and Chopper quickly took each a piece and the last piece was now the target of the three D's.

\- That is MINE, all three of them yelled out at the same time. Three forks flew out to reach the last piece of meat.

In the blink of an eye three fist flew through the air and all three of them took a long flight out into the terrain. The grunts that was heard from the family scared even Robin who dropped her book and took shelter behind a barrel of sake.

In a great clash of Haki the pirates and the old Marine ended up in a gigantic ball of energy turning the remains of the feast into dust and sharp needles of shattered bones. Franky looked over at Sunny that now more looked like a hedgehog than a ship from all the shattered bones embedded in her side.

\- Age goes first you ungreatful pieces of slime, yelled Garp

\- You don't need more food you old geezer, Dragon grunted with clenched teeth.

\- I need it to be the Pirate King, Luffy shouted as he went into Second Gear.

The trio clashed into a huge ball of energy again. All of the Strawhat crew now used what means they had to dig holes. Robin used about 4 000 hands to dig, Franky used all his stored cola on a gigantic Coup de Boooo to make a trench big enough for himself, Brook, Nami and Usopp. Sanji turned and fled to who knows where. They later found him in a tree on Fishman Island muttering something about tripple D is only good when it comes to Namis bra.

Chopper had more luck. His feet was fast enough to dig him a hole. It was later known as the big dig.

The mighty D's had enough will and power to once again split up in three. With the last piece of meat in the middle of them as the origo of three huge centers of Haki all D's loaded up as much power as they could in the final confrontation. The entire crew of Strawhat, exept for Sanji who was nowhere to be found anymore, took shelter as good as they could when the three colossus began their path to destruction.

Luffy, Dragon and Garp now charged towards the final piece of meat and with the thunder like three enormous Haki-users they engaged for the last time. The effect on the island was total devastation. It was flattened like a pancake. All across New world the shockwave ruined islands near and afar. Shanks fell over really bad. No… He was just drunk.

The strawhats emerged from their foxholes. When looking over towards the three relatives the see them sitting sobbing over the last piece. It has now gone from a state of delicious food to something ending up in a volcano, chewed on by a SeaKing, run over by every pirateship and finally crushed by the depths of Fishman Island.

Luffy was first up from the ground standing looking att the sorry excuse of grilled raven. The other two did the same and in silence they stood there for a while. Nami took the courage to encounter the family. But VERY slowly. She approached the three just to find that all of them stood there sleeping. She screamed out and… Yepp you guessed it. Three great bumps on each D's head.

All of a sudden a shimmer in the air appeared. Slowly it materialized into Gol D Roger.

\- You! Garp shouted. Am I never gonna get rid of you ? You ruined my family with your One Piece.

\- Shaddap you old geezer, Roger sneezed. I'm going to tell you my true secret now.

\- WOOOOOOHOOOOO, Luffy shouted.

\- You have allready found it, Roger began. The last piece of meat after a humoungus feast and many who want it. That is the true meaning of One Piece.

\- That figures, Dragon said and facepalmed violently. Missing his own head. Took Garps head instead. Garp went flying.

Luffy just looked in awe at Roger as he started to fade away. Rogers last words before he vanished in a puff of smoke were – Ha ha ha. Fooled all of the world. So worth it. Now go find the second Piece…


End file.
